Tag: beta readers

1 July Updates – Risky Business

No Excerpt this week
Instead, I am asking for feedback on the following four synopses. Please have a read and let me know how I can improve them. There will be a free e-book copy of each book for any synopsis that I accept. This can include any book I publish this year.

Ordo Lupus and the Temple Gate
His teenage daughter is viciously murdered in Lyon by a long-forgotten biblical monster. A former WWII MI6 agent, our hero is suspected of her murder by the police and his divorcing wife.

With supernatural powers of foresight he goes on the run to clear his name. He has only one friend – a historian and member of the modern Knights Hospitaller but with his help he embarks on a white-knuckle ride to salvation. Continue reading “1 July Updates – Risky Business” →

Too Bright the Sun – Illustrations

My third reader to finish the draft novel has commented that he thinks it would be nice to have a few pages of illustrations of the various vehicles, guns and devices in the book and I must say I think it’s a good idea. More value for the reader. I might have a go myself.

Anyway looking for illustrations (would need to black and white although there is space for 1 colour illustration on rear cover) of:

MCS (both versions Mark 6 and 7)
J5 (Standford Torus Space Station)
X.50 laser
X.77 short-range laser (X.77 is equivalent of an Uzi – short barrel, no stock, optional second handle). Both this and X.50 would have the Trion logo on the side
Alien ‘Clover-leaf’ laser
IM truck
SU 401 Attack Fighter

All-comers welcome

IM Alien ‘Clover-leaf Laser’ by El’Phantasmo

These are my Latest Updates

I haven’t had much time to post recently. Yesterday most people I sent freebies of Ordo Lupus and the Temple Gate received them in the post (I sent out 10 copies) including my parents. Most seem to like the look of it. Still not sure about the cover. There is some dissension so I may try changing it slightly on the kindle version to see if it has any effect.

In the mean time work continues on Iron/Too Bright the Sun. I am thinking now that it does lend itself to being a trilogy and perhaps that’s why I cannot decide on the title. Perhaps the series should be called the Iron Trilogy and the first book would be Too Bright the Sun. In any case I am getting ideas for the second volume. I need to spend some time working through them in my mind to see if they are viable.

I do really want to understand why Inchoate sells so well. I think it is a combination of the choppy, fast paced dialogue and narrative combined with the viewpoint of a delinquent adolescent, and perhaps the theme of sci-fi, religion and time travel.

I Have Received useful Feedback

OK all the readers who are going to complete my draft have completed it and I have all the feedback. It makes for very interesting reading. The curious thing – which I didn’t expect but probably should have, is that they all completely disagree.

While one person thinks that one chapter or section is boring, for another it is their favourite part. This makes it quite difficult to do any editing at all although there were some areas that all felt could be improved. A secondary problem arose from that though:

For instance one passage that several felt was really extraneous I deleted, and then did a kind of flash-back just for the vital details of that section – like a summary. But then people said it sounded like I was rushing on to the next bit. Even worse, one reader said that for the next section there then wasn’t enough background so that I even contemplated putting the original section back in. Continue reading “I Have Received useful Feedback” →