Category: FICTION

My first book available in India and Egypt is Inchoate: (Short Stories Volume I) and it’s FREE!

Short Stories Series (all use same cover)

Egypt or any part of Africa through Kobobooks.com, I am told. I need somebody in Egypt to test this.
http://store.kobobooks.com/en-gb/Search?Query=lazlo+ferran
nb: you will have to convert the book to .mobi using a free software programme called Calibra if you want to read them using a Kindle device.
If you have problems let me know by commenting or emailing me so that I can send you a workaround.

You can always find details of availability and updates on the Catalogue page of this website.

If you live in Egypt please can you test the Kobobooks source and get back to me?

OCD Log 1

This week, first of my new OCD updates and FREE eBook Offer: Eighteen, Blue

OCD Log 1
To make it easier to find my updates on OCD, I am starting from today to name them Log 1, 2 etc. Too often, these posts might get lost among other subjects and I am aware there are many sufferers out there.
In my last OCD update, I announced my first OCD-Free day. It was really just an experiment and I didn’t expect it to work. But it seems to have worked.

OCD-Free is a strong term however. I think it would be more accurate to say that I have ‘broken the back of my OCD’ or ‘turned a corner’. The OCD is still there; every day I catch myself doing something that I call ‘OCD behaviour’. I just stop myself, say, “That is OCD behaviour. I am not going to do that,” and then ignore the impulse.

This tactic doesn’t always work. Strangely, it works better for physical events than purely mental ones. I am still prone to moments of hesitation or what I will call ‘colour blocks’ – a distaste or guilt, if you like, for looking at cert.

But on the whole, things are much better. My partner is over the moon and suddenly I can eat what I want, and I have much more time each day to focus on writing and practical tasks. OCD was a big waste of time and I knew it.

So how have I made this leap forward?

1. There are complex factors but I think the biggest is the boredom I suffered after giving up music full time in the early 1990s. Music really absorbed me. I was passionate about it but to earn enough money to survive, and produce albums, I had had to busk and this physically exchausted me. At the end, I had severe back pain, so bad I could only sleep on the floor, and I was too tired to move. It was then, I decided to go into IT. I don’t denigrate IT at all, I earned a good living from it for almost 25 years but it was not so interesting as music for a very creative person.

2. My last job, in IT, was extremely stressful. There was a lot of ‘office politics’ totally unnecessary for the job at hand, and this drained me.

3. I must say a word about my partner. She has been a mountain of strength. Her patience and understanding are LEGEND as far as I am concerned. She has definitely been one of the biggest factors in helping me overcome OCD. If you are a sufferer, never underestimate how much support your loved ones can give you. And if your loved one has OCD, never underestimate how much support they need.

I should also mention The OCD Work Book. I am not sure how much help this book was, but I know some of its exercises were so mind-numbingly boring that they gave me a big incentive to ‘make a break’! You can find a link to the book on my OCD page.

So if you are an OCD sufferer, or think you might be, have patience. I had it for 20 years, 18 of those without acknowledging it and without help, and I have managed to make progress.

If you have something you want to say about OCD, please don’t hesitate to comment here and I will do my best to give you an answer.

FREE eBook offer!
To celebrate my progress with the OCD (and because I need the publicity!) Eighteen, Blue: (Short Stories Volume I) is FREE from 24-26 May on Amazon. Here is the link: http://bit.ly/19xmNJq

I have rarely offered this book free and in fact, this may be the first time so make sure you grab a copy. It will be the only chance you have to read the short stories, Eighteen, Blue and the romantic science fiction tale, Another one for No. 19.

Eighteen, Blue
On the Rebel held wastelands of North American in the 22nd Century, biker bounty hunters choose their victims according to their playing card rank. But in this life-or-death game of poker, one player holds the trump card.

Another one for No. 19
Machine 19, the last Janitor bot still moving, travels on to its last assignments as Isha and Danel in NewYork District of Central City wonder how to change their meaningless lives.

This book may well soon become available on Amazon because they have banned one of my books which has forced me to seek other outlets. But more of that next week.

Science Fiction eBook – Too Bright the Sun – is FREE this weekend!

Love Blade Runner? Download the 5★ Science Fiction novel FREE on Amazon from Saturday 3 May until Wednesday 7 May: http://bit.ly/102Xt92. If you don’t have one already, make sure you download a copy!

Too Bright the Sun is now in the goodread lists: Can’t Wait Sci-Fi/Fantasy of 2014 and Best Dystopian and Post-Apocalyptic Fiction so if you have time, please vote for it here: https://www.goodreads.com/list/book/17664602 by clicking on the list name at bottom of page and then clicking on the ‘vote’ button beside the book title!

BookCoverPreviewToo Bright the Sun: “Engaging” “Thought provoking” “A good sci-fi battle romp” “The writing style is unusual”
This book has been compared with the work of Phillip K Dick, who wrote Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?, the book that became the film Blade Runner.

You will find a link to my main page about Too Bright the Sun in the menu at the top of this blog.

Below is an excerpt from the book, below that my thoughts on writing the book and at the bottom is a link to an interview with the main character, Jake Nanden:

Excerpt
When the Sun was almost touching the horizon of Mars, my father said, “Now Jake! Lift up your filter.”
With difficulty, because my fingers were so small, I lifted the outer U.V. filter and gasped. The white disk of the sun almost burned a hole in my head. Its white was so intense it was almost blue and the blue became a corona as my eyes quickly looked up and away from it. The corona gradually faded into a riot of colour that filled the rest of my vision. The purples and oranges were deeper than those in a bowl of the freshest and most tangy grapes and peaches. For a moment I almost lost my balance and felt myself falling forward into a forever-sea of spectral light. We stood on the edge of time – until the Sun had completely disappeared below the horizon and then, eventually, my dad sighed and said, “Let’s go.”

The last part of the trilogy- Iron III: Worlds Like Dust will be published in summer 2014.

Why I wrote Too Bright the Sun
I have always loved sci-fi but at the time I wrote this, I was under a lot of pressure in my day job and going through a dark patch. I have long had a soft-spot for noir films so I decided to write a noir-sci-fi novel. I also love Isaac Asimov, Arthur C Clarke and Phillip K Dick – particularly Blade Runner, all for their quirky stories but deep-rooted scientific authenticity. The result is Too Bright the Sun, which I am very proud of. Ultimately, I think it is a very beautiful story of one replicant struggle for identity and the surprising outcome.

If you love character-driven sci-fi, you will love the twist at the end.

Interview with Jake Nanden
https://lazloferran.com/toobrightthesun/interview-with-jake-nanden

Finally, here is the Ischian – alien – Clover Leaf laser rifle from Too Bright the Sun

Alien_laser

If you don’t have one already, make sure you download a copy! http://bit.ly/102Xt92.

My special offers this week and: How do you market your books?

This week: OCD Update, special offers and: How do you market your books?

OCD Update
I am proud to announce that today is my first OCD-FREE day of this year (and for about 20 years for that matter!). It is probably just an excersise but if it works I will stick to it.

Basically I woke up this morning, took a long, hard look at things and decided I didn’t have time for the OCD any more. Anyway, my fear of getting fatal diseases (like AIDs for instance) simply haven’t come true, probably because I have been very careful. For whatever reason, now seems a good time to try this. I already feel I have burned my bridges somewhat so there may not be any way back in the short term.

No doubt, my mind will try to take over and my ‘OCD-self’ will try to gain the upper hand so watch this space. But if you don’t hear any more about my OCD, then I am free of it. Let’s just keep our fingers crossed.

In order to achieve an OCD-FREE state, I need to be very focused on something; I get bored very easily and I have a hyperactive mind, so expect me to be working very hard on the books and promoting myself in the near future. Read on, if you are interested in the promotion and please do buy one of my books if you are at all interested in my views or stories. I really appreciate the support of all of you and I would love to sell more books!

To mark the occasion of my OCD-FREE day attempt, I have changed one of the eyes of my twitter and Facebook header’s. It now represents blue sky, for optimism.

How do you market your books?
This question has plagued me recently. My sales almost stopped after 10 March. I could see no reason why. My sales were good for January and February. I was beginning to sell books at a higher price so I was happy. Then, the slump! I have thought long and hard about it and I conclude that the only possible cause must be that I am marketing less hard lately.

So I have created some new marketing images (see below) and I will be trying a few tools other than the infamous Facebook adverts over the next few weeks.

I have discovered these 2 tools:
https://app.adroll.com/dashboard
http://www.advertisingwebservice.co.uk

I will be spending half of my profits (after personal hours spent writing!) on adverts so I will let you know how I get on.

If anybody has tried either of these tools or knows anything else I can try other than Facebook or Google ads – both of which I have tried and had limited success, please let me know.

I have found that although I can achieve a fairly high CTR (click through rate) of 0.08% on Facebook, these simply don’t convert to sales. This may be because my blurb about the books doesn’t appeal or because my ads don’t relate clearly enough what I am offering. If anybody has any interesting views on this that they wish to share, please do.

Special offers
A reminder: Inchoate: (Short Stories: Volume I) is FREE if you are in the States and I have added Vampire Beneficence to it. Get it here: http://bit.ly/IRGYaE
Ordo Lupus and the Temple Gate will be 99c from Friday 2 May until Tuesday 6 May. Get it here: http://bit.ly/15R1xOL

Below are the new marketing images, including my first attempt at a Lazlo Ferran logo. Please let me have your opinions and any other ideas I can try for marketing.

The new Lazlo Ferran logo in red
The new Lazlo Ferran logo in red
The new Lazlo Ferran logo in white
The new Lazlo Ferran logo in white
Ordo lupus and the Temple Gate advert image
Ordo lupus and the Temple Gate advert image
The Devil's Own Dice advert image
The Devil’s Own Dice advert image
Attack Hitler's Bunker advert image
Attack Hitler’s Bunker advert image

Ordo Lupus (The Order of the Wolf): who do you think they are?

This week: Grammar and Onomatopoeia and – Ordo Lupus (The Order of the Wolf): who do you think they are?

Grammar and Onomatopoeia

Grammar
I am just doing a light re-edit of the second book in the Ordo Lupus series: The Devil’s Own Dice. I have been pleasantly surprised how good it is! I occasionally go back to old books to just bring the grammar up to date. This is because, not only do my grammar skills improve as I publish more work but also there are fashions in grammar and these gradually change! Yes, it’s true!

Of course everybody knows that the meaning of a word can change over time. This field of study is called semantics. The obvious example is ‘gay’. When I was young this simply meant ‘happy’ or ‘bright and cheerful’. Now it most usually denotes someone physically attracted to the same sex.

Another word which changes meaning with time is ‘insidious’. The meaning of this word seems to actually fluctuate during cycles of about ten years. It can sometimes mean ‘subtle’ and sometimes mean ‘subtly bad’.

In two of my books, written in the mid-noughties, the phrase ‘in-control’ comes up quite a lot. People actually used said that a lot during the 80s and 90s. Now, nobody seems to use it so I take it out wherever I see it.

While I edit, I also look at ways to subtly improve the text. Occasionally, particularly when the action gets going and where most writers tend to use less commas, I find too many of the blighters. This sentence had two but by removing them, I created a much simpler sentence with a more flowing ‘feel’. Actually, I am quite pleased with this sentence; its quite difficult to create one this long which has no commas and yet is grammatically correct (correct me if it’s wrong somebody):

I did my best to stand up straight and look dignified in the doorway at the top of the stairs while the water dripped from my cloth hat onto my nose and then to the dry stone floor.

Onomatopoeia
Finally, I had the rare chance to improve on my use of onomatopoeia when I came upon this sentence:

At the sound of eight tolls of the nearby Abbey bell, I made my way back to Herleva’s room.

I instantly saw that this sentence had some onomatopoeic potential. I wanted this sentence to communicate a gloomy mood. What if eight syllables reminded me of the sound of a bell being tolled? What I ended up with is this:

At the sound of eight bells, tolled from the nearby Abbey bell, I made my way back to Herleva’s room.

Here we have the eight syllables: eight (1) bells (2), tolled (3) near- (4) by(5) Abb- (6) ey (7) bell (8).

Of course, strictly speaking this is not onomatopoeia. Nevertheless, the sounds of the words reflect the feel I want to get across so I think it’s very effective.

One wag quipped that in this case it may even simply be euphony (any agreeable (pleasing and harmonious) sound) because the sound of a bell ringing is pleasant but I would argue that I am not trying to create a pleasant sound, but a gloomy one.

See if you can find a sentence in one of your books where you can try this sort of trick. Writing can often be about mood-setting and this trick can work well.

Ordo Lupus (The Order of the Wolf): who do you think they are?
I have often been asked where my idea for the Ordo Lupus occult thriller series; Ordo Lupus and the Temple Gate and The Devil’s Own Dice, came from. Well, to be honest, the idea didn’t come completely out of the blue.

I had been interested in werewolves and vampires for a while. I was also intensely interested in cults and secret societies. Long before Dan Brown’s The Da Vinci Code, I was interested in the Knights Templar and through this came to books by Henry Lincoln like Key To The Sacred Pattern: The Untold Story Of Rennes-le-Chateau (sadly out of print but still available on Amazon as a hardback). These books led me to an interest in the lost treasure of Rennes-le-Château and from there to an interest in the Cathars.

All this interest may well be because my family’s roots are in that region of France. In fact, one of my ancestors may well have been a Cathar!

So the seeds were there for a book about mysterious treasure and secret societies were planted in my mind. Then I stumbled upon this video on youtube while googling wolf cults:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DpJwzIC4G_4

I didn’t think too much about the video but at the end there was a link to a website:
http://www.ordolupus.org

I typed the address into my browser and came upon the most bizarre website I have ever encountered! The appearance is nothing special, forbidding crossed swords on a plain, black background and with nothing in the way of information about the cult apart from the enigmatic phrase ‘Don’t forget who you are’. Perhaps the introverted aspect of the website tempted me to enter my details in the hope that I would gain membership, if only for journalistic reasons.

I was to be sadly disappointed. Not only did they not respond to my submission, but when I messaged them on youtube, they didn’t respond there either. Frustrated, I copied their video, colour-corrected it and posted on my own youtube channel (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QFYgIWQXS4Y). I was sure this provocative act would get them talking to me but no! They have never once contacted me. In fact, apart from a brief mention in a UK national newspaper (I can’t remember which one) and two mentions in Le Monde (29 September 2009), I have been able to find no other references to the cult.

And yet the website is still there!

Incidentally, from the Le Monde article I was able to find the park in Lyon where the beast was filmed and even the balcony from which it was most likely filmed. The trees are Plane Trees and from their size, I would estimate the beast was one of three things: a large alsatian/newfoundland cross, a smallish newfoundland, a wolf (they are not uncommon in Southern France although they are not known to enter the cities) or something else…

The website never changes. Clearly, my submission for membership did not arouse their interest, nor did I fit the credentials they are looking for. They ask the nascent member to say a bit about themselves and check that you are an adult but nothing I have tried, arouses their interest. Perhaps I need to be a werewolf? Ha! Ha!

In any case, I decided to write about Ordo Lupus. I made most of the detail up but speculation about this most secret, and exclusive of cult societies in inevitable.

So, tell me what you think. who do you think they are?

What is the back-story behind your books?

This week: Here is the back-story behind my newly published volumes of The Ice Boat Volume II and The Ice Boat – 2 in 1. What is your back-story?

The Ice Boat
In the Lazlo Ferran Newsletter which went out to my friends last weekend, I announced the publication of the last volume of The Ice Boat and a 2 in 1 version, which includes both volumes in one book.

I published Volume I back in 2009. It is semi-autobiographical, largely anecdotal, and was the first novel I wrote, even further back, in 2003.

The Ice Boat is largely autobiographical, although certainly not for most of the erotic passages, which are many. It was written at a time in my life when I was frustrated by my own lack of wisdom; in particular my inability to be neither totally cynical or optimistic. Perhaps because I had just moved from a life as a full-time musician to an IT professional within the science sector, I felt a little bit ‘dislocated’.

I remember completing it while on holiday in Spain. I sat on my balcony, late into the hot evenings, writing the last chapters with a cold drink! The whole novel was written on paper. Writing in long-hand allows your thoughts to flow more freely. I think that is why this book is more like a stream-of-consciousness than any of my other books. The drawback was that ten years later when I re-located the manuscript for Volume II, I couldn’t read my own handwriting!

I lost the manuscript for Volume II when I married and it wasn’t found until late in 2013 by a cleaner! Now it is published for the first time.

That is the story behind my book The Ice Boat. What is yours?

Description of The Ice Boat
“The only reason anyone went out was to buy drinks in town. The tide of cans was always in on the studio floor.”

With plenty of drugs, sex and rock and roll; The Ice Boat is a modern pop-culture odyssey.

David Dee has almost got it; with a solicitor girlfriend, a job, a flat and a band in London, he almost has the happiness he has worked for all his life. His reluctance to compromise takes him away from London to disaster in Rio de Janeiro and on to surreal adventure and self-discovery in Amsterdam.

You can buy ‘The Ice Boat’ Volumes I and II in one book: The Ice Boat – 2 in 1 at a considerable saving.

All three eBooks and paperbacks of The Ice Boat are available on Amazon from today:
The Ice Boat – Volume I http://bit.ly/OqGsCT
The Ice Boat – Volume II http://bit.ly/1gCfK15
The Ice Boat – 2 in 1 http://bit.ly/1g08qwE

17 Days to War?

17 Days to War? This was the innocent looking subtitle for an episode of a recent high profile BBC series to mark the Centenary of World War One. It instantly upset me, not deeply – I mean I wasn’t throwing things at the TV or thinking about writing a letter because I was close to tears. But the grammar of that phrase bothered me! I think the Beeb made a shocking error here because their grammar is ambiguous and could mean something insulting. Let me explain:

17 Days to War may seem like an innocent phrase to you but it grates on me, as a writer, editor and reader. It grates especially because I know a thing or two about war, although I have never had to fight in one, for which I thank God in my heart almost every day! I am not a war-lover, despite writing fiction about it. I have an affection for the technology used but more than this, I love writing about people, people in difficult situations, and there are no more extreme situations than war. I would like to think it’s an emotive subject for anybody.

That’s why it is particularly important that the BBC get it right. That’s why I was disappointed that the BBC – known as Auntie Beeb to some of us since childhood because of its supposedly ‘teacher’ attitude to delivering content. One is supposed to be able to rely on the accuracy and correctness of anything they show us. I think the Beeb made a shocking error here because their grammar is ambiguous and could mean something insulting. Why do I think this?

Of course, such language might be part of this new trend to ‘dumb down’ everything for the masses. I hate the trend in adverts of taking good songs, even great songs, like All You Need is Love and not only getting a choir to sing them but actually changing the unusual original time signature to 4/4 and cutting out half a bar just so that ‘normal people’ can hum it more easily! How the hell did it become one of the biggest sellers of the 60s then if people couldn’t hum it! Are people becoming more stupid? Perhaps they will do if advertisers treat them that way. I also hate the poor grammar now used in adverts. All of this just makes BBC’s slip worse.

According to dictionaries:
Oxford Dictionary
The word ‘War’ can be a noun; 1- A state of armed conflict between different nations or states or different groups within a nation or state (ie Japan declared war on Germany), 2- A state of competition, conflict, or hostility between different people or groups (ie she was at war with her parents), 3- A sustained effort to deal with or end a particular unpleasant or undesirable situation or condition (ie a war on drugs).

4-The word ‘War’ can also be a verb; Engage in a warm (ie small states warred against each other)

5-According to Macmillan Dictionary it can also mean: b) [COUNTABLE] a particular period of fighting between countries or groups of people

Let’s look at possible uses of these terms in sentences

I may as well say in advance that I don’t think any of them do but if you think differently, please let me know:

However, the usual construction for indicating a period leading up to war would be ’17 Days until War’, not ’17 days to War’. Nowhere can I find an erudite quote using that sentence construction. It seems to me that the BBC has erred shamefully here. And it’s not even a main title!

I could accept it if it were a main title. There are many book, film and newspaper article titles that do not use good grammar. Just to gran somebody’s attention, I think its acceptable to bend the rules a bit. But here it is just a subtitle so it should fit one of the correct forms

Similar Examples

Another word that is both a noun and a verb is ‘sleep’. It too is a state, can be a period in time and can also be something you do.

You can say, “We are going to sleep.”

You can say, “We are sleeping

But you wouldn’t normally say 17 hours to sleep because that can mean two things; 17 hours of sleep or 17 hours available in which to sleep. They are both quite different.

Yet another word which can be both a noun ( a state) and a verb is holiday

You can say, “We are going to holiday.”

You can say, “We are holidaying

Now if you say 17 hours to holiday, that can only mean that you have 17 hours in which to holiday.

Looking at the phrase in a purely temporal setting:

Can you say 12 hours to noon?
It sounds weird. That’s because it is wrong!

12 hours to live makes you think of 12 hours left to live.

You don’t say one month to Christmas. You say one month until Christmas.

I would love to know that the BBC’s title is correct. But I don’t think it is and I think the meaning suggested by the phrase, ’17 Days to War’ is 17 days within which to make war! This is an insult to all those who suffered in the Great War or remember somebody who did. Not only that but it also contradicts the whole mood of the series, which aims to show how almost everybody did their utmost to avoid war. If I was a conspiracy theorist I might even believe that the War was deliberately started by the British Government and that the BBC is secretly trying to divulge this! Either way, shame on you BBC!

Is there a specific grammatical rule for war and time that I don’t know of? I would like to think the BBC knows some archaic grammar rule regarding the word War. I would be a lot happier if there was one and I knew it. But have searched on the internet and I can’t find it. Perhaps there is, and if if allows the phrase 17 Days to War, please can you let me know?

How can I get my stories into Arabic, Urdu and other languages for my fans?

I am becoming increasingly frustrated by the lack of translation services on the internet and the quality of those that do exist. For some time I have been gaining a disproportionately large number of fans in Egypt and India. I don’t know why this is, but that’s hardly the point. If these people are interested in me, then I want to publish something that is easy for them to read. In other words I want to publish in their languages: Urdu and Arabic.

You are probably thinking; what’s the point? If they understand English then they can read it and if not, why bother? Well, I just feel that they deserve it!

Until now I have used Google Translate – http://translate.google.com for twitter and Facebook posts. It’s okay for short posts but as everyone probably knows by now, it’s not great. If you have ever received spam from a fake Russian girl looking for a boyfriend you will know what I mean. The result is a sort of gobble-de-gook; a soup of phrases that overlap each other and mean little. I recently tried to translate a tweet into Chinese and then translate it back to see how good/bad it was. I had to make several attempts before I could get anything that retained even the basic meaning of what I was saying!

The problem is exacerbated by the fact that Arabic, for instance, comes in many flavours and the Arabic that Google Translate uses is closer to the Koranic Arabic than any modern dialect. That is what my Arabic-speaking friends tell me. It is probably the same for Urdu.

Anyway, in an experimental effort to get things moving I am going to post this blog in Arabic and Urdu and then my short story Inchoate in both languages using Google Translate. I know the result will be terrible but perhaps the result will guilt somebody out there into helping me. I can’t afford professional translators so I would like anybody to correct just one sentence. If you can do this I would be very grateful and I will give you a free copy of Vampire Beneficence – a collection of short stories and three first chapters of my best-selling books. So come on, get cracking! Just comment below with the original sentence and the translation.

Blog in Arabic
أنا أصبحت على نحو متزايد بالاحباط بسبب عدم وجود خدمات الترجمة على الإنترنت ونوعية تلك التي لا وجود لها. لبعض الوقت ولقد تم الحصول على عدد كبير جدا من المشجعين في مصر والهند. أنا لا أعرف لماذا هذا هو ، ولكن هذا لا يكاد نقطة . إذا كان هؤلاء الناس مهتمون بي، ثم أريد أن ينشر شيئا من السهل بالنسبة لهم للقراءة. وبعبارة أخرى أريد أن نشر في لغاتهم : الأردية والعربية.

ربما كنت تفكر ، ما هي الفائدة ؟ إذا كانوا يفهمون اللغة الإنجليزية ثم يمكنهم قراءتها ، وإذا لم يكن كذلك، لماذا تهتم ؟ حسنا، أنا فقط يشعرون أنهم يستحقون ذلك !

حتى الآن لقد استخدمت الترجمة من Google : http://translate.google.com في تويتر و الفيسبوك المشاركات . انه بخير للوظائف قصيرة ولكن ما دام الجميع ربما يعرف حتى الآن ، انها ليست كبيرة. إذا كنت قد تلقيت أي وقت مضى البريد المزعج من فتاة روسية وهمية تبحث عن صديقها وسوف تعرف ما أعنيه. والنتيجة هي نوع من تلتهم دو جوك ؛ حساء من العبارات التي تتداخل مع بعضها البعض و تعني الشيء الكثير . حاولت مؤخرا لترجمة تويتر إلى اللغة الصينية ومن ثم ترجمتها إلى الوراء لنرى كيف جيدة / سيئة كان عليه. كان لي لجعل عدة محاولات قبل أن أتمكن من الحصول على أي شيء حتى الاحتفاظ المعنى الأساسي لما كنت أقوله !

وتتفاقم المشكلة من حقيقة أن اللغة العربية ، على سبيل المثال ، ويأتي في كثير من النكهات و العربية أن الترجمة من Google الاستخدامات هو أقرب إلى العربية القرآنية من أي لهجة الحديث. هذا هو ما أصدقائي الناطقة بالعربية تقول لي . وربما هو نفسه بالنسبة الأوردو.

على أي حال، في محاولة تجريبية ل تحريك الأمور وانا ذاهب لنشر هذا بلوق باللغتين العربية و الأردية ثم ضعي القصة القصيرة غير المكتملة في كل من اللغات باستخدام ترجمة غوغل . وأنا أعلم فإن النتيجة ستكون رهيبة ولكن ربما كان نتيجة إرادة الذنب شخص هناك في مساعدتي . لا أستطيع تحمل المترجمين المحترفين لذلك أود أي شخص لتصحيح جملة واحدة فقط . إذا كنت تستطيع أن تفعل ذلك وسأكون ممتنا للغاية وأنا سوف أعطيك نسخة مجانية من مصاص الإحسان – مجموعة من القصص القصيرة و ثلاثة فصول الأول من كتبي الأكثر مبيعا . حتى يأتي يوم ، والحصول على تكسير ! مجرد التعليق أدناه مع الحكم الأصلي و الترجمة.

Blog in Urdu
میں نے انٹرنیٹ پر ترجمے کی خدمات کی کمی اور موجود ہیں کہ ان کے معیار کی طرف تیزی سے مایوس ہوتا جا رہا ہوں . کچھ وقت کے لئے میں نے مصر اور بھارت میں شائقین کی ایک غیر متناسب طور پر بڑی تعداد میں حاصل کر رہے ہیں . یہ ہے کیوں مجھے نہیں معلوم ، لیکن اس مشکل بات ہے . ان لوگوں نے مجھ میں دلچسپی رکھتے ہیں ، تو میں ان پڑھ کرنے کے لئے آسان ہے کہ کچھ میں شائع کرنا چاہتے . اردو اور عربی : دوسرے الفاظ میں میں نے ان زبانوں میں شائع کرنا چاہتے ہیں .

آپ شاید سوچ رہے ہیں، کیا بات ہے؟ وہ انگریزی سمجھ تو وہ اسے پڑھ کر سکتے ہیں اور اگر نہیں تو ، کیوں پریشان ؟ ٹھیک ہے ، میں نے صرف وہ اس کے مستحق لگتا ہے کہ !

http://translate.google.com ٹویٹر اور فیس بک خطوط کے لئے : اب تک میں گوگل کے ترجمہ کا استعمال کیا ہے . یہ مختصر خطوط کے لئے ٹھیک ہے لیکن ہر کسی کو شاید اب تک جانتا ہے کے طور پر ، یہ بہت اچھا نہیں ہے . کیا تم نے کبھی ایک پریمی کے لئے تلاش ایک جعلی روسی لڑکی سے سپیم موصول ہوئی ہے تو آپ میرا کیا مطلب پتہ چل جائے گا . نتیجہ ہیں gobble -DE- gook کی ایک طرح سے ہے، ایک دوسرے سے متجاوز اور تھوڑا سا مطلب ہے کہ جملے کی ایک سوپ . میں نے حال ہی میں چینی میں ایک ٹویٹ میں ترجمہ اور پھر یہ تھا کہ کس طرح اچھا / برا دیکھنے کے لئے اسے واپس کا ترجمہ کرنے کی کوشش کی . مجھے کہہ رہا تھا کی بھی بنیادی معنی کو برقرار رکھا ہے کہ کچھ حاصل کر سکتے ہیں سے پہلے کئی کوششوں کو بنانے کے لئے تھا!

مسئلہ عربی ، مثال کے طور پر ، گوگل استعمال کرتا ہے کسی بھی جدید بولی سے قرآنی عربی کے قریب ہے ترجمہ ہے کہ بہت سے ذائقوں اور عربی میں آتا ہے اس حقیقت کی طرف جارہی ہے . یہ میرا عربی بولنے والے دوست مجھے بتاو کیا ہے . یہ اردو کے لئے شاید ایک ہی ہے .

ویسے بھی ، چیزوں کو منتقل کرنے کے لئے ایک تجرباتی کوشش میں میں گوگل کے ترجمہ کا استعمال کرتے ہوئے دونوں زبانوں میں اپنے مختصر کہانی شروع کرنا تو عربی اور اردو میں اس بلاگ پوسٹ کرنے کے لئے جا رہا ہوں . میں نتیجہ خوفناک ہو جائے گا معلوم ہے لیکن شاید نتیجے میں جائے گا جرم کسی وہاں میری مدد میں . میں نے کسی کو صرف ایک کی سزا کو درست کرنا چاہتے ہیں تو میں پیشہ ور مترجمین متحمل نہیں ہو سکتا . آپ یہ کر سکتے ہیں تو میں بہت شکر گزار ہو جائے گا اور میں آپ کو ویمپائر فیض کی ایک مفت نقل دے گا – مختصر کہانیاں اور میری بہترین فروخت ہونے والی کتابوں میں سے تین سب سے پہلے ابواب کا ایک مجموعہ . تو ، چلو کریکنگ حاصل ! صرف اصل سزا اور ترجمہ کے ساتھ ذیل تبصرہ .

Update to this Article: I found a translator and Inchoate is now available in Urdo here: http://bit.ly/amincte

Where could vampires have come from?

This week: An interview with Jake Nanden from the Iron Series and: Where could vampires have come from?

Where could vampires have come from?
I am not going to say here whether vampires exist or not; that is a question I might never find an answer to. But where could they have come from if they do exist? That is an interesting question.

funnily enough, since the beginning of man’s history, vampires have been seen to be some kind of ‘elite’. They are even idealised versions of humans in some stories. Recently this thought has played on my mind a lot.

It would seem logical to assume that the natural suspicion working and middle class people feel for royalty and nobility might naturally lead to an attribution to them of ‘unnatural powers’. I don’t think this is a modern trend and might have even been more prevalent in the age when Royalty were seen to be mandated by by God to rule

Vlad III, known posthumously as Vlad the Impaler because of his cruelty was just one such ruler. His first name, Dragwlya, is the origin of the modern name Dracula and Vlad is most likely the source of the legend of Dracula – a fiend who drank blood.

Then we have Elizabeth Báthory (be patient if I seem to be going over old ground here). She was also accused of drinking the blood of virgins.

What do both have in common? They are both European royalty. What else do we know about European Royalty (and indeed what did common folk know at the time about them)? They tended to inbreed. what sort of symptoms can one expect from inbreeding? An increased chance of haemophilia. Indeed Vlad III is rumoured to have suffered from it.

According to wikipedia: Haemophilia lowers blood plasma clotting factor levels of the coagulation factors needed for a normal clotting process.

In genetics it is linked to the X-Chromosome. Men have an X and a Y chromosome and women to X chromosomes and a Y chromosome. Thus haemophilia in women is very rare: if one X-Chromosome will not support the coagulation, the other X-Chromosome will express it. That is perhaps a good thing because the gene for haemophilia is inherited through the mother. The last thing you want in a royal family is a woman with haemophilia. If she is a silent carrier, her sons are 50% likely to suffer from haemophilia, if she herself shows symptoms, her sonds are 100% likely to suffer. And certainly in the middle ages it dramatically cut life expectancy; few sufferers would even reach adulthood.

But guess who was a silent carrier? Queen Victoria. From her, were born most of the European royalty for the next 100 years. And of course Czar Nicolas’s son suffered from haemophilia. A haemophilia sufferer will tend to be mororse, tend to stay inside and probably exhibit a paler complexion than other children or adults (if they are lucky enough to reach maturity). Is it too much of a stretch of imagination to suppose that haemophilia, and more particularly, haemophilia in royalty may be the source of the legend of vampires?

I am not discounting the idea that Vampires have a separate existance from this and indeed a legitimate place in the tree of evolution. But I propose that one of the legends around them originates in the European Royal Disease – haemophilia.

What is your opinion? Please let me know and join in the debate by commenting below.

An interview with Jake Nanden from the Iron Series

This interview appeared on the Library of Erana blog a few weeks ago. Thanks very much to Alexandra Butcher for permission to publish this.

Tell Us About Yourself

Name (s): Jake Nanden

Age: 34

Please tell us a little about yourself. I am 5’11’, dark hair, short – Army cut, slightly curly. Green eyes.

Describe your appearance in 10 words or less. Getting middle aged, slightly paunchy with drying skin – like paper in places – except my mech arm. That’s synthetic skin on there and as smooth and supple as the day it was sprayed on. I even had mine tattooed but don’t tell anyone.

Would you kill for those you love? I kill every day – most days – to keep my culture intact. I would say that is killing for those I love. Of course there is a moral code… And as a soldier the moral code is almost everything. After a while… killing… it sometimes seems to be the only thing you have left. Family are too far away.

Do you like animals? I love animals. Their love is unconditional. You can never quite be sure with humans, can you?

Do you have a family? Ha! Ha! Yes. A test-tube. No seriously my mother – Mary, my sister Justine and a dog – a collie called Frisky. My adoptive dad was the famous robotics designer Robert R. Nanden but he’s dead. My mother was his assistant and pretty accomplished at that!

Can you remember something from your childhood which influences your behaviour? I am not sure about any of my childhood memories. They are probably all implanted. I am a replicant. The first memory I am sure about is playing on the grass with my adoptive mother watching me playing cricket.

She shouted out, “Jake! You are such a talented cyborg!”

Even at my tender age, I knew a replicant was not the same thing as a cyborg and I knew that she should know, as her first husband had been a famous robot designer. Her words had always stuck in my head.

But anyway, adoptive parents of replicant children are always told to create some vivid experience for their kid in the first few days so that the imprinting takes properly. So it’s probably not significant.

Do you have any phobias? Mirrors. Can’t stand them. They make me sweat and… well, I’m very nervous around them. I avoid them.

Please give us an interesting and unusual fact about yourself. I write books – well, I am writing my first; a detective thriller. It’s kind of Raymond Chandler-ish. I call it Chandleresque, but I guess that’s bad English. My adoptive parents are first generation J5 – that’s a space station – so they kinda inherited a USAC – United States of America and Canada – accent. Anyway, I am rambling. The main character is Dusty. He’d a sucker for the pretty ladies!

Tell Us About your world

Please give us a little information about the world in which you live. Well, I was born on Mars – at least I was adopted on Mars. We lived under a dome for most of my childhood. My most precious memory is of my dad taking me out on a hoverbike to see the real Mars sunset. Of course, you could see sunsets from the dome, but the U.V. protection took out most of the colour and I had nagged him for weeks to take me outside to see one. With difficulty, because my fingers were so small, I lifted the outer U.V. filter and gasped. The white disk of the sun almost burned a hole in my head. Its white was so intense it was almost blue and the blue became a corona as my eyes quickly looked up and away from it. The corona gradually faded into a riot of colour that filled the rest of my vision. The purples and oranges were deeper than those in a bowl of the freshest and most tangy grapes and peaches.

Does your world have religion or other spiritual beliefs? Do you travel in the course of your adventures? If so where? That’s three questions in one! Yes of course there is religion but I struggle to believe in anything other than a goal of justice – for my friend’s death. We have the usual Christianity, Islam and Hinduism, and a few others that go way back on Earth. Plus we have the got Mech! Well, what can I say about him? It started with cyborgs and androids worshipping the God of mechanical things. They believe Mech created humans to service the machines. Lately even replicants are converting. Most replicants find it difficult to have faith in anything other than themselves.

Name and describe a food from your world. We can make what we like using n-gens; nano-generators. ‘Fried’ is my favourite: bacon, eggs, potatoes, beans, fried-bread and mushrooms. I am old enough to remember what these things are called, and what they look like. To most grunts they are just ‘fried’,

Does your world have different races of people? If so do they get on with one another? We are more concerned with Ischians – aliens. We call them ‘Dogs’ because they have evolved from something like dogs. Pretty formidable though… You don’t want to mess with Ishuns. Races? I don’t think anybody notices any more. Still a stigma to being a replicant though. I think that’s where people’s racism has gone.

Name a couple of myths and legends particular to your culture/people. Mech, the god for all A.I. beings, as robots and androids were now permitted to call themselves, lived in a red world of dust which corroded him and he had three sons, Iron, Tin and Wire. They lived in the desert for they were afraid of the sea, but one day Iron, who was the eldest son, committed a sin by openly doubting Mech and Mech banished him. Iron wandered alone until he came to the sea, and left his mark upon a rock but no more was ever heard from him again.

I guess the other one is that God looks after us all. Replicants don’t agree. You should see the size of funeral urns replicants get. Then you would know all about inequality.

Author notes:

Book(s) in which this character appears.

The Iron series: Iron I, Too Bright the Sun, Iron II, Unknown Place, Unknown Universe and Iron III (published soon) Worlds Like Dust

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